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Dating an Older Man: Pros, Cons, + Advice For The Modern Woman


A post shared by old love young oldmanyoungwoman on Nov 13, at am PST. Some of us can't help it, but we have a thing for older men. I'm not talking about the guy who is a year or two older than you, I'm talking about the guys who are at least 10 years older. I have always been attracted to older men, so I get it. When I was in high school, I wasn't interested in the guy my age, I was interested in the guys who I shouldn't have been attracted to. So, I avoided dating until I was in my 20s and in college. Older men offer so many things that men my age never could, although I have to admit that over the years there have been some negative things I've found out as well.

Much more stable than most men in their 20s. There is something refreshing about being with a man who is financially stable. He isn't spending money going out and burning his whole paycheck at the bar. He's also emotionally stable. Older men typically know who they are and are there for you much more than younger men. As far as I'm concerned, stability is vital for me in a relationship.

I want to have a family, and finding a man who is already financially and emotionally stable in his 20s can be difficult. It's not impossible, but it's difficult.

A man in his 20s isn't typically very experienced. He's 'green'. If he's dated, his relationships haven't been very serious and more than likely he's only dated a few girls since high school.

Life experiences are so important, at least they are to me when it comes to the man I'm with. I have experienced a lot of grief and heartache and I want a man who can relate to that. I want a man who understands life and isn't just worried about what party he's going to crash next weekend.

Older men get it. Older men have been able to experience life more, so they know how to handle the hard things in life and know how to celebrate and appreciate the good ones. My advice might be a bit skewed since I've only had one boyfriend who was in his 20s.

However, I have to say that dating older men can be more stimulating mentally and emotionally than a younger guy in his 20s. He can challenge you to be so much better than you think while keeping you grounded at the same time. An older man has experienced life and appreciates women more. Speaking of experience Older men are much more experienced in bed and, let's be honest, they should be. If you are seeing a guy who is 10 years older than you or more, he should be much more experienced in bed.

If you want to try something new, talk to him and ask him. I'm sure he has plenty of tricks up his sleeve. In my experiences with older men, I have found that they are great communicators. They know what they like, so they will figure out what you like and will often do it.

I've never been with an older man who has been shy. Their experience in the bedroom has taught them to enjoy the intimacy with a woman and to make it more about her than it is him. Men in their 20s tend to be selfish in the bedroom - in my experience at least.

When I have been with a man who has been older than me, he has been the complete opposite. Older men make it about us, women, and they always seem to be that much happier at the end. Their experience over the years pays off in our favor in this case. Dating older men has a number of advantages, as far as I'm concerned. One of those advantages is that he knows what he wants from a partner, life, and everything else.

He has goals. There isn't very much guessing while you're dating older men. They will be honest with you about what they want, where they stand and where your relationship will go.

Older men don't hide things and aren't going to waste time leading you on - most of the time.

Pros and cons of dating someone older than you

When a guy is in his 20s, he still wants freedom, so they don't want to settle down or make a commitment. It's like they are still in high school and just want to party and live life day by day. Most younger guys aren't thinking about anything more than that, so they aren't sure what they want from a relationship. They just know they like you and want to keep you around. Older men are different because they know what they want. If it's casual, they will tell you; if it could lead to more, they will tell you.

If they are looking for a wife and want to have children, you will know. Older men have been there, they aren't going to play games unless that's who they are, but we will get to that later on.

If they haven't done it already, most older men are ready to settle down. Some might have been there and won't go back into a marriage. However, for the most part, an older man in his mids is ready to settle down and have a family.

At this point, they already have gone to college, have an established career, and are now ready for a wife and family. If you are looking to settle down, you will have better luck with an older man than a guy in his 20s. A man in his 20s who wants to settle down, especially if he is only years out of high school, is hard to find. A post shared by old love young oldmanyoungwoman on Nov 12, at am PST. The dating game was never my thing. When I was in high school and even college, I hated it.

One thing that always drew me to older men was that they don't play games. If they are interested, you'll know, as you won't have to wait days to see if he will text or call. Now, there are some older men who have always played games, and this is why they are still single. Be careful of those ones. If he's willing to play games in the beginning, it's my advice to be very careful because he will probably always be playing some kind of game with you and your heart.

Older men who are worth your time don't want to play games.

They are serious about your relationship, even if it's casual. This is one of my favorite things about dating older men! Every relationship has its downside.

Some of those downsides are worth dealing with, others aren't. Some of the 'red flags' or cons of a relationship should automatically tell you to run. Here I have listed the most common cons I have found about dating older men.

This definitely isn't a comprehensive list. I hope this helps you decide whether the man you're dating is worth staying with, or if the downside is just too much to bear. I don't necessarily think that older men do this on purpose, but I guess some do.

If that's true, then they probably did it on purpose when they were in their 20s as well.

In that case, I'm not sure I would bother with them. I do, however, seem to take it in stride when an older man I'm dating does this. It generally comes out when they are trying to give you advice. I don't think they mean to be condescending, but when someone 10 years older than you or more is giving you advice about a job or another situation, at times he can be condescending. Again, I tend not to take this personal, but some people do.

If this is a pet-peeve of yours, then I would say that my advice would be to take a closer look and maybe even talk to him about it. If it seems like he's doing it often and it's just becoming too much, then maybe it's time to look for a new guy. This is one of my biggest pet-peeves and it doesn't matter if I'm dating someone in their 20s, 30s, or 40s. A man who treats me like a child when we fight and have an argument is not a man I want to be with.

This is different than him being condescending. It's when he scolds you, shames you, or makes you feel like a small child when you have 'done something wrong', and that is how he will put it too. It won't ever be his fault. Again, I don't care if the guy is older or not, but this is one of those things that I have no patience for.

My advice would be to get out now. You deserve to be treated better than that! Older men can definitely be more controlling than younger men in their 20s or so. They are looking for a man who can accommodate their somehow innate but childish tendencies and not become unnecessarily agitated by it. Simply put, most women desire a man that would accept and love them for who they are. And from all indications, it appears that this important desire of theirs is best fulfilled or met in older men.

Some women define their emotional security in terms of mutual respect. In other words, they do not like to be with a man who would constantly remind them that he is in charge. You are probably one of such women. You dislike guys who seem to be emotionally immature and wanting to take back his own pound of flesh at every perceived wrong he feels you have wronged him. Definitely, this attitude is unlikely to be found in a man who is 20 something plus older than you. Again, if we must not leave any stone unturned, we would have to admit that men who are far older than their spouses tend to be financially stable too.

Of course, he would have settled down for a steady source of income and that is another form of security that college boys and young men of your age group may not have yet.

By and large, the reason for you falling in love with a man that is 20 years older than you might not even be among any of the above. In fact, you may not be able to explain it.

That is quite possible. However, in most cases, it appears that the inner desire of most women which appears to be well-captured in men that are advanced in age constitute the major reason young women like yourself often get attracted to significantly older men.

No doubt, dating a man 20 years older than you comes with some benefits. And for many who have been struggling to disengage themselves from such relationships, it is usually these derivable benefits that make it challenging for them to quit.

Here are some of them.


Started HouseofCards. Oh, sweet lord, hello there, Kevin Spacey Sir, I wanna be on you A man that is 20 years older than you will, definitely, be mature in every sense of the word.

This is especially true if you did not start your relationship very early. And that means that when you are 25 years, your man is already You should expect that a man of 45 years would have seen a lot in life to make him a point of reference in terms of maturity. For most people, maturity comes with age.

You are sure you are not with a wet-pant who's looking for someone to spoonfeed him in all matters of life. Apart from him being able to make the right decision other things being equalyou are sure that he's got enough experience in his account to take care of your emotional needs.

For such men, you only need to sigh and they know what it means. This maturity, if well-managed, may result in a seamless relationship that can stand the test of time. At least you are sure he isn't going to get angry easily like the college boys or pick at every statement that you make.

That aside, you are able to trust him with your issues more because you know that even if he doesn't have the immediate answer to your puzzle, he probably knows where to get it. What's more, his maturity will also make you trust his judgment more and this is a plus to any relationship.

The Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man

A post shared by Melisa Louise Oldcorn melisalouise. For reasons that are quite obvious, older men are much more stable than younger men. In most cases, such men are already decided on which career to pursue and what their life values would be. They are not easily swayed by enticements that often sweep most young men off their feet. You are sure that if such ones should commit to you in a relationship, they are less likely to jilt you later.

And which woman does not like a stable man?

Certainly age is just a number. But what that number means may have impact or not. I've dated men much older and somewhat younger than I. Are you attracted to men who are 10 years older than you or more? Here are the pros and cons of dating older men. This is one of my biggest pet-peeves and it doesn't matter if I'm dating someone in their 20s, 30s, or 40s. A man who treats. The Pros And Cons Of Dating A Man Older Than You . You are sure you are not with a wet-pant who's looking for someone to spoonfeed him.

It's such a peace of mind to know that you are with a man who has mapped out the direction he wants to follow in life. As it is, this direction seems to become clearer with age. The stability appears to be in all spheres of his life even to his finances. If everything is working well for him, at that age when he is 20 or more years older than you, he would have gotten stable financially too.

This is no small advantage to consider at all. Financial and emotional stability are two great factors that if lacking in any marital relationship can easily rubbish it. At first, young couples presume they can brush over it claiming that love covers all things but they later come to realize how significant financial and emotional stability is to marriage. Cred; mysixtiesaddiction DonDraper and BettyDraper in a happy moment A post shared by sallydraperandco on Jan 10, at pm PST.

With a man older than you for like twenty years, sex is really going to be what it ought to be and which is lovemaking. You are not in bed with a lad who is just trying to figure out how things work.

He probably knows how to go about the bedroom affairs very well. While you are still trying to understand how your body works and respond to sex, the older man would help you get around issues and put you through effortlessly. By virtue of his age and perhaps experience, he probably knows all the erotic spots on a woman which he can manipulate to give you a seventh-heaven feeling at bedtime hour.

Just imagine how he'll hold and kiss you with his years of experience! At least not like that of your contemporaries who are as knowledgeable as yourself in this regard. Except in a situation where he may want to exploit you based on his age and experience, sex with an older man can be very deep.

You are desired and cherished by him and there is no subject in which he would be too ashamed to discuss with you in this regard. Younger men would rather see sex as an adventure and would probably be somehow unreasonable with their demands. But for the old man, there is nothing to be curious about; he knows exactly what he wants and how to get it. All you need is L.

Better With Age: 10 Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man I always seem to date guys between 10 to 20 years older than me, and from my relationships comes some of the best Why would you date someone that old?.

E and D. Comparatively, the older man knows how to take care of his younger partner than the much younger men. Although you may need to have experienced both sides before you come to such an inference, the truth is that in a relationship that is governed by love, the much older man can be incredibly caring. He remembers your anniversary dates and buys a lot of convenience for you as much as his money can carry him.

Granted, younger men too can be caring but maybe not as deep at the older ones. It's one thing to want to want to do a thing; it's another thing to have the means and know-how.

Take, for example, if you become pregnant, he probably is well aware of your emotional needs and if there are no issues between you both, the quality of care you are likely going to receive from an older man would by far surpass that of a relatively young and inexperienced guy. His position alone in the society would likely win you some respect and care from everybody.

Dating. The Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man. Anna Nicole Smith If he's lived an extra 10 years longer than you, he's likely to have the. Let's discuss some of the pros and cons of dating someone older: experience dating and therefore treat you with more respect than those. Dating an Older Man: Pros, Cons, + Advice For The Modern Woman Whether you believed it then or not, dating in your 40s or older . Clearly, you haven't found what you're looking for yet, so why not go with someone older.

So, adequate care is one inseparable benefit of dating a much older man. One thing you would probably not be missing when going out with a man that is at least 20 years older than you is appreciation.

It is an area where he beats his young rivals. As it is, our sense of appreciation tends to increase with age. While younger folks would later have to learn this as they grow older, older men would most likely make your life easier by being very much appreciative of your good gestures. It is a truth that many young folks despise their youths, or in some cases, allow it to be despised by someone else.

It is later when they have grown old and cannot reverse to the youthful life that most begin to appreciate that important period of their lives. In the case of your older partner, he surely will be grateful to have someone that can connect him back to the good old days. Won't you rather want to be with a man way older than you but who still appreciate you in every way possible?

At some point in your dating life, you will be approached by an older man. There are of course many pros and cons to dating a man old enough to with a great vintage Cabernet Franc than going out to the club (hopefully). Young Women & Older Men: Dating Pros & Cons if you've ever dated someone 10 years or more older than you, you probably experienced some of the best. Everyone knows how to date older than toshiro stayed silent for men know before marriage. 13, you may 21, and cons dating older man who likes weed as much as Relationship with someone for you know how to lose by being with age of.

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